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Dungeons & Dragons: Session 4 – Candy Crushed

Candy Crush costumes at NYSE

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Last time on Dungeons & Dragons, stuff happened. I, JMB, was not present but MD was there and he promised to do the recap blog for session 3. Until such a blog happens, I will leave this paragraph impugning his dependability.

Level 1: Combat

After the wolf combat in the mansion, the party experimented with doodling. Jhekesan drew a partial map of the mansion on the table cloth in his blue crayon (using about 20% of it). When Flip went to add some orange coloring to it, the map floated above the table and other stuff passed right through it. Flip made his own orange draying, which was solid.

A couple people in the party went toward the eastern door from the room where they could hear screaming. Upon entering, a female servant gnome and two humans had barricaded an armoire with some furniture. The female gnome was babbling about how this dude Charlington had been turned into some horrible creature. Then, a paper thin arm reached through the armoire, undid a knob, and kicked the barricaded furniture away. The creature that burst through was a dwarven man covered in mostly black scribbles on his shirt.

Combat ensued. Specifically, (1) our barbarian Venner really bashed the shit out of the dwarf monster’s hip; (2) our dragonborn Jhekesan took his silk rope and tied the monster to the armoire; (3) someone (Flip?) hit the monster with a sleep spell.

During the combat and after, Raleigh was attempting to flirt with the gnome servant lady. When things calmed down, we learned from the servant lady that (1) “Master Brindle” drew on Charlington’s clothing, (2) Brindle is the child of the house, and (3) the father of the house is the Ableheim Abelheim Prang fellow we were tasked with finding last session.

The servant lady then asked for a wand of scouring, which we had earlier acquired, and waved it over Charlington. The doodles went away and he got more 3Dimensional. She explained that the wand of scouring is only good for 3 uses a day. She also mentioned something about a brother Benson and we said we’d met someone who matched that description. Raleigh asked somewhat sexually if she knows anything about spanking, which is somehow the most plot-related flirtation so far. The servant lady didn’t pick up what he was putting down.

Basically at the last second we learned her name was Cecilly Anythip Cecily Enipip. We did not bother talking to the human (read: normie fighters) servants.

Level II: Stealth

Going back to the big room, Bo opened the door to the south. There were 2 orc doodles with bombs and axes at the end of the hallway with their backs toward the party.

Bo took the wand of scouring, and snuck all the way behind one of the orcs. But when he waived the wand, it did nothing. Bo was able to sneak his way back to the party and regroup.

Bo and Flip then teamed up to carefully open the first door off the hallway to the South. When the door opened, there was gibberish screaming noises. The orcs heard the noise, but dropped the weapons, cried, and ran away. [When later Jhekesan went to pick up the discarded weapons, they were gone. Spooky] The rest of the party followed Flip and Bo into the room with the gibberish. The noises were coming from 2 adult doodle figures on a bed. They did not react at all to questions.

The party investigated the north door in the noisy room and saw it had a lock with 3 keyholes. The three locks were different colors (which I neglected to write down), one of which was scribbled out. Turning to the other door, Venner burst through. The room to the south was a study. In the middle of the room, almost like a storm cellar, was a purple doodle door with a purple handle. Along the walls were books about art and art history (to Jhekesan’s chagrin, there was no atlas).

Boss Battle

Suddenly, the chair behind the desk spun around, revealing the (dickless) candy monster the party (minus Venner) encountered in Session 1. 3 stacks* of books came to life as well.

Combat ensued. People’s faces got clamped by the stacks* of books. Flip and Raleigh tag teamed to pry one off of Flip’s face. Bo did roguish things in the corner (hid like a bitch), and then used Venner’s massive and book-clamped frame to perform some roguish stealth attack. Jhekesan at some point cast fog in the middle of everything which was totally necessary. Greg shot ice bolts at the Candy Monster and maybe one other spell to mix it up.

Candy Monster wielded a purple crayon and cast doodles. One of those doodles burst through the fog and ensnared Bo. Fold returned from the pocket dimension and relayed the wand of scouring to Bo, who used it to undo the purple snares. The killing shot was a fireball from Flip, which went through the core of the Candy Monster’s head and dropped down like a hot ball of magma through sugar.

Scoping the room out after the combat, we learned that the painting behind the desk was of a beautiful elvish castle. Then we opened the purple door.

Level III: Dungeon Exploration

The purple door lead to an uneven doodly stairwell with doodly hovering flames. The stairs were so uneven some suffered fall damage.

Continuing through the corridor at the end of the stairs, the party came across a large cage of irregular purple bars from floor to ceiling. A man and woman were tied up in the cage by thick purple cords. Also in the cage was a 5 foot Teddy Bear with a yellow axe and an 8 inch-tear in its head with stuffing coming out.
large cage

As someone examined the lock, the bug pictured above crawled down. It did some rhyming nonsense about us needing to help him to find a key. Raleigh solved its riddle (What’s brown and sticky? A stick) and we got access to the cage.

In the cage was also the gnome from earlier, Benson. We freed him and he thanked us, but didn’t give us any money. He did say to swing by Benson’s Emporium of Wellgood tho and that he was a man of his word, like Venner. We also mentioned something about his sister to him, I think.

Greg gave a rousing bagpipe performance that stirred the sleeping adults. We learned at some point that they were Ableheim Abelheim Prang and his wife Belfred Belfried. They immediately started bitching at each other. I don’t even remember if we cut them down by the time we called it a session. I do remember that we got a gray crayon and all levelled up by demanding God grant us strength (to which he acquiesced). On that note, I have to edit my character sheet.

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